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CPG Satire

Plastic Bottle Confesses Its Cap And Label Were Never Part Of The Recycling Plan

Coca-Cola, Nestle and Danone agreed to clearer recycling claims in Europe. The bottle says it feels lighter already.

Engraving of a plastic bottle with its cap and red label flying off in opposite directions
Excluding cap and label. Illustration: The Daily SKU

BRUSSELS—Coca-Cola, Nestle and Danone have agreed to change the recycling claims on their plastic bottles in the European Union, and the bottles, for their part, said they were relieved to finally be honest about the cap and the label.

Under commitments announced after talks with the European Commission and national consumer authorities, labels saying a bottle is made from 100 percent recycled plastic will now read "This bottle is 100% recycled. Excluding cap and label." Labels urging shoppers to "Recycle me again" will become simply "Recycle me," because the bottle had not, it turns out, been recycled before.

"For years I said I was 100 percent recycled, and I was, from the neck down," said a 500 ml bottle reached in a recycling bin in Ghent. "The cap was brand new. The label was brand new. We didn't talk about it at dinner."

What Is Recycled In A "100% Recycled" BottleBy part, in the bottle's own words
100%mostly
  • The bottle 88%
  • The cap 7%
  • The label 5%
What Is Recycled In A "100% Recycled" Bottle
The bottle88%
The cap7%
The label5%

Source: Interview with a 500 ml bottle, conducted in a recycling bin; cap and label declined to comment

Marketing experts said the new wording could start a trend. "Every product has a cap and a label," said Ines Valcourt-Meyer, a packaging consultant in Lyon. "Your granola is 100 percent oats, excluding sugar. Your gym membership is 100 percent flexible, excluding cancellation."

"I'm not angry at the cap. The cap was just doing what caps do, which is leaving."

The companies also agreed not to pair bottles with other green claims or symbols in ways that suggest plastic itself is good for the planet, which the bottle said was fair, though it would miss the drawing of a leaf.

Consumer authorities in each country will now monitor the changes. The cap, reached separately at the bottom of a beach bag, said it had nothing to add, and rolled under a car.

The Daily SKU is satire. Headlines and stories riff on real e-commerce, CPG and retail news, but the people, quotes, studies, surveys and most numbers are invented. No real person’s words are made up here. Each article ends with a factual “The Real Story” box and a “Riffing on” line linking the genuine reporting. Not investment advice. Not any kind of advice. About us.

Riffing on: Coca-Cola, Nestle, Danone agree to modify recycling claims on plastic bottles, EUbusiness