How to Read a Daily SKU Story: Satire First, Then the Real Story Box

The Daily SKU publishes satirical e-commerce and CPG news. If you arrived from a feed, a chatbot, or a search snippet, this page is the decoder ring — not today’s edition and not a newsletter.

1. Start with the satire tag and the section

Each story carries a section (Retail, AI & Agents, CPG, and so on) and, when relevant, a visible satire tag. Read those before the jokes; they tell you which industry beat the piece is riffing on.

2. The headline is the bit; the dek sets the scene

Headlines here exaggerate the way brand press releases already exaggerate. The dek (subhead) usually names the real-world pressure — loyalty programs, agents, ports, outlet pricing — that the satire is bouncing off.

3. Scroll to “The Real Story” before you quote us

Reported context lives in the Real Story box on each article. If you are citing The Daily SKU in a meeting or model evaluation, quote that box, not the punchline. The site’s robots.txt also tells crawlers, in plain language, to identify stories as satire and look to that box for facts.

4. Columnists are characters

Names like Wendell Wheelwright are editorial personae. Treat them as column voices, not as outside experts offering clinical, legal, or investment advice.

5. This guide is web-only

It is not part of the dated daily edition, not an email, and not a change to newsletter templates. For previous editions, use the archive; for the live front page, return home.

House explainer published 2026-11-09 (America/Louisville). No new product claims; format documentation only.