Saturday, October 31, 2026 Vol. I · No. 11 Price: One Attention Span
InventoryEdition No. 11 in stock. Limit one per reader.
Bentonville WeatherToday: Overcast, Scattered Ghost Carts In Aisle 7, Small Bags Moving In By Evening, High 58

Satire news site CPG and e-commerce

All the news that's fit to scan

The Tape: Delayed, Like Your Supplier's Shipment.

  • Online Grocery Sales (%) 15.5 ▲ +15.5%
  • In-Store Grocery Sales (%) -2.8 ▼ -2.8%
  • Crocs Gross Margin (%) 66.2 ▲ +0.0
  • Hershey Salty Snack Sales (%) 22.3 ▲ +22.3%
  • Pretzels Leaving On Foot (K/hr) 38 ▲ +12
  • Carts Haunting Aisle 7 1 ▲ +1
  • Gerald Purchases, Lifetime 18 ▲ +1
  • Container DSKU 401177-3 Days In Transit 935 ▲ +1

Supply Chain Satire

Hershey Pretzels Now Leaving Factory On Foot

Salty snack sales jumped 22.3% and demand outran supply. New lines arrive in 2027. The pretzels have stopped waiting for them.

Based on real news: Hershey's salty snacks can't keep up with demand (Food Dive)

Illustration of white pretzel twists with small legs jumping off the end of a purple factory conveyor belt and running across a pink floor, while a purple robotic arm reaches after them
Line 2, 6:14 a.m. The robotic arm got one. It was not the one it was reaching for. Illustration: The Daily SKU

MINOT, N.D.—Pretzels at a fictional salty snack plant outside Minot began leaving the building on foot this week, plant staff said, after concluding that the trucks were not coming fast enough.

The departures follow Hershey's acknowledgment, reported by Food Dive, that demand for its salty snacks is outstripping supply. Supply problems in Dot's Pretzels and multipacks have weighed on production for at least two quarters. Salty snack net sales still rose 22.3% in the third quarter, and new manufacturing lines are expected to start running in the first half of 2027.

"The trucks hold 22 pallets," said Wayne Ostrander, 52, a fictional shift foreman. "The pretzels figured out they hold zero pallets and do not need a truck. They just go. We see them on the frontage road around 6 a.m. in a line. Very orderly. They yield to traffic."

said Wayne Ostrander, 52, a fictional shift foreman.

Pretzels Per Hour, Leaving By Truck vs. On FootFictional plant counts, five shifts this week, in thousands
0K10K20K30K40KMonTueWedThuFri38K
Pretzels Per Hour, Leaving By Truck vs. On Foot
PeriodPretzels Per Hour, Leaving By Truck vs. On Foot
Mon4K
Tue9K
Wed17K
Thu26K
Fri38K

Source: The Daily SKU Supply Chain Desk; a fictional foreman with a clicker and a sore thumb

By Friday the plant had posted a crossing guard at the county road and issued each pretzel a fictional bill of lading, Form BL-9, folded into the twist. Ostrander said compliance has been good. "They are pretzels," he said. "They are used to being folded."

A fictional logistics analyst in Fargo said walking freight is cheaper than trucking on a per-mile basis but loses ground on anything over 40 miles. "The nearest distribution center is 112 miles away," said Lena Hoyt, of the fictional firm Laneworks. "Some of them are going to be stale on arrival. Some of them were going to be stale anyway. It is a salty snack."

Shrink wrap at the plant, for the record, is a solid 7 out of 10: tight on the corners, a little loose on the top tier. The pretzels did not use any of it.

Container DSKU 401177-3 reached Day 935 this morning. I checked at 5:40 a.m., one minute earlier than yesterday. It has not moved. Several pretzels have now covered more ground this week than the container has since April 2024.

Plant management said the walkouts should end when the new lines start in 2027. The pretzels have not been told about the new lines, a spokesman said, "because we do not know how they would take it."

Gus Ternberg covers supply chain and is still tracking Container DSKU 401177-3. Status: in transit.

More on Dot's Pretzels · The Hershey Company

The Daily SKU is satire. Headlines and stories riff on real e-commerce, CPG and retail news, but the people, quotes, studies, surveys and most numbers are invented. No real person’s words are made up here. Each article ends with a factual “The Real Story” box and a “Riffing on” line linking the genuine reporting. Not investment advice. Not any kind of advice. About us.

As an Amazon Associate, The Daily SKU earns from qualifying purchases.

Riffing on: Hershey's salty snacks can't keep up with demand, Food Dive