Beer Sales Slip Again As Americans Report Being Too Tired To Cope Recreationally

BOSTON—Boston Beer Co. said Thursday that depletions, the industry’s measure of how much beer distributors sell to bars and stores, fell 5 percent in the third quarter, extending a slide that analysts attributed to a nation that would love to unwind but is, frankly, too tired.

“Consumers still enjoy the idea of a cold beer after work,” said Rhonda Sikes, a beverage analyst at the fictional firm Tapline Partners. “They just enjoy the idea of being horizontal by 8:40 more. We are seeing heavy substitution toward lying down.”

The company’s gross margin rose 90 basis points, a result Sikes called ‘deeply impressive given that fewer people are drinking.’ “They’re making more money on each beer than ever,” she said. “It’s just that each beer is increasingly alone.”

“The modern drinker is health-conscious, budget-conscious and asleep.”

Bartenders confirmed the trend. “People still come in,” said Luis Ferro, who tends bar in Somerville, Mass. “They order one, look at it, say ‘I have a thing tomorrow,’ and leave. Nobody has a thing tomorrow. Everybody has a thing tomorrow.”

At press time, Sikes had declined an after-work drink, citing a thing tomorrow.